My Invisible Illess: A Poem by Lu Sobredo

My Invisible Illness

The illness my body hosts,

it is a chameleon—clever

and full of surprises.

It disappears for a time

giving false hopes

only to reappear as if harmless.

Its pretense, unconscionable and vindictive

as though envious of my drug-induced, thanks

to science, near pain free idleness.

In its invisibility, the illness tiptoes surreptitiously

into my days and nights like a cat burglar but

dismissive of the hour. It eats away

at the fragility of a new normal

I fought to reconstruct from nothing

but sheer will and stubborn resolve not to surrender

to an invader I cannot see. Its presence

is much like a vengeance.

A force warring against my body,

my life sustaining organs,

leaving me no place to hide because it hides in me.

Clever, indeed, in all its invisibility.

Cruel in its malevolence.

The periodic new normal that medicine allows

Is temporal, but it hypnotizes one to think

I’ve won over the devastation the illness

Inflicts on the body and beyond. Wretchedly

this invisible illness ransacks

the reserves of energy

I’ve quietly and painstakingly

collected over time, amidst tears

and when ravaged in unspeakable pain.

The invisible illness my body hosts

Is an unwelcome guest. When it cries for attention,

It does so when least expected, and it demands

I cry in chorus with it. I feel

every bitter taste and pulsating pain

leaving me zapped and tormented.

I cower momentarily

but continue to breathe through

the invasion, hopeful for my spirit

to transcend the broken bridge I must cross.

One more snag, one more of life’s trials

with which I must make peace while

remaining faithful and true to the mission

I must still fulfill on earth despite this illness.

This invisible affliction, millions of us have come

to know thy name—Rheumatoid Arthritis.

We know thee well, the invisible illness our bodies host.

Thou hast not stopped lolling in and out

my door like a chameleon toying

with my earthly life. Thou art a hurdle

but not an obstruction dampening my will.

Comments

Travel and Why Not?

By Lu Sobredo WELCOME to LuTravelsAbroad Website! What's new with me? TODAY I am exploring possible format/design for my LuTravelsAbroad website, for my Blog and Facebook page. Tickled to be launching a new venture. I have this incredible feeling of drive from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. A similar feeling that came over me when I finally realized I will travel abroad again. Travel while disabled, you might ask? Why not? Mother & Son: Midnight in Paris, ©James Sobredo 2004 WHY A TRAVEL BLOG The Travel Blog and Facebook web presence is meant to be a self-help travel corner, and a vehicle for opening up about my personal health journey. When preparing for the 2016 travel, some websites and travel blogs were a great help. While in Spain as I focused on the moment and less and less on what discomfort to anticipate, I gradually experienced the thrill of traveling. It was then that I began to envision creating a one-stop self-help corner for peopl

Ten Essentials for Autumn Travel to Spain

TEN ESSENTIALS FOR AUTUMN TRAVEL TO SPAIN By Lu Sobredo The warm weather hasn’t completely waned, but there are signs of the new season including a little chill in the early morning air. As of September 22, 2021, North America is officially into autumn and I am thrilled! A year and half of waiting for COVID 19 infection cases to decline in the U.S. and other parts of the world has been challenging. But survived, I did! So did my circle of friends and family. I feel for those who did suffer much and lost loved ones or colleagues to the indiscriminatory virus. Diligent adherence to health protocols have helped and I wished many more would take the risks seriously by getting vaccinated, continuing to mask up and limit exposure by distancing or gathering responsibly in small crowds. I feel fortunate to qualify in the late summer for a third vaccine. Being someone diagnosed with an autoimmune illness renders me high risk to infection. On August 31, 2021 I walked into a pharmacy and took con

Finding Philippine Art at the Asian Art Museum

by Lu Sobredo Viewing Philippine Art at the Asian Art Museum. ©Lu Sobredo 2017 "Celebrate the rich diversity of Philippine art with 25 compelling works recently added to the Asian Art Museum’s collection. Expressive indigenous carving, jewelry and textiles; Christian devotional statues from the Spanish colonial period; postwar genre and landscape paintings; and contemporary works come together in this intimate exhibition to tell fascinating and complex stories of the Philippines.” ~ Asian Art Museum Introduction I’m surprised to be hanging out on a Thursday afternoon at the Asian Art Museum in San Francisco in the middle of summer. Most times, I am there either appreciating some permanent exhibit or being drawn to a special exhibit or event. Sometimes, I could be found simply sitting at the museum Cafe sipping green tea and lingering over an apple almond tart. It is at these moments when I am moved to write. The writing I do these days is for my blog.

Through His Camera Lens: Lights, Landscapes and Life Abroad

by Lu Sobredo ~Celebrating the many dimensions of my husband James Sobredo: his interest, talent and heart as reflected through his camera lens. Introduction Yes, my son and I, and sometimes our friends take very good pictures with our mobile phones. But the person, whose camera lens I totally rely on to document life's moments and special places, is my husband James Sobredo. Being around him and his photography partner and close friend, Steven Montalvo when on their photography shoots, is both meditative and exhilarating to watch. As if their eyes are connected to their hearts. And after many hours and enormous patience, they might be happy with the outcome. I know I am. Folks have asked me why I find blogging so much fun? Other than the fact that: My family actually have visited the amazing places I write about. I get to meet fascinating people and who have become part of my family’s life. As strange as this sounds, it’s even fun to awkwardly attempt speaking a d

Great Friends Make Great Medicine

GREAT FRIENDS MAKE GREAT MEDICINE By Lu Sobredo There is a new drug in my health journey: a daily dosage of friends. When added to my pharmaceutical regimen, it seems to magically expand the time between flare-ups. Closest Best Friend, My Beloved: Our 26th Wedding Anniversary at The Kitchen in Sacramento. ©James Sobredo The stores were about to close when I was struck with a yen to pick up bowtie pasta at the Italian Deli in my neighborhood. It’s not every day that I make an impromptu dash to the store. Once there, it’s never just bowtie pasta that finds its way into the shopping cart. Just ask my young, adult son who drove me there. It wasn’t going to be a quick trip after all. I ran into my primary care doctor and his lovely wife at the grocery store. She has a PhD and rightfully has the title of Dr., I thought to myself. My M.D. asked about my recent visit with my neurosurgeon. Aside from a chronic illness, I also had a mass in my r

Walking the Camino de Santiago: Pilgrimage on My Terms (Parts 1 & 2)

By Lu Sobredo PART I Introduction Walking near the border of France and Spain through the Spanish Pyrenees to the city of Santiago de Compostela was not the vacation I envisaged, not for my first trip to Spain in 2010. However, my husband James, the avid adventurer had other ideas born out of an earlier visit to Madrid and Seville in 2006. It was a decision that turned out to be monumental for the family and deeply personal for me. Mother and Son Bonding on the Camino. ©James Sobredo This essay is sprinkled with practical hints from lessons learned in the pilgrimage. It is a personal reflection of the whole experience. It is about the physically challenging, emotionally invigorating, and spiritually uplifting journey. It was an experience made increasingly significant because of a life-changing diagnosis that followed three years later, a diagnosis that has rendered me chronically disabled. I sincerely hope this serves as an important reminder to all: act no

Top 10 Restaurants We Love in Spain

By Lu Sobredo Gastronomy and Spain have become synonymous. Writing this photo essay makes me think of scrumptious meals. My mouth is literally watering with great longing to return. Since starting my blog in 2016, my husband and I are often asked for recommendation of places to eat when in Spain. I have given recommendations in a private message through my travel Facebook Page: Lutravelsabroad . And I do it happily. But there is no reason to keep our recommendations private. When one finds a gold mine, I believe it is important to share the wealth. My family and I have managed to partake in culinary feasts on a budget when traveling. When we do some modest splurging, it is all planned and calculated into our travel expense. Why not live a little while we still can? If curious, you can still access my first Blog post on the subject: Happy Eating on a Budget in Spain . This earlier essay takes you from the Madrid area and Barcelona, to the Galician region in Santiago de

Search This Blog